The transition from an intimate partnership in which the parents share a personal relationship to the more distant co-parent relationship is difficult for many Massachusetts parents to manage. The difficulty is compounded because often each parent has different preferences and expectations for co-parenting.
The main reason to work at co-parenting is that it helps children deal with all the changes that happen when their parents are no longer together.
So, with the interests of the children always in mind, Massachusetts parents who are entering the world of co-parenting should consider the following:
- Act neither like business acquaintances nor like strangers-instead, aim for a friendly but restrained style.
- Keep your opinions about each other’s choices, actions, and character to yourselves.
- Engage in positive exchanges much more frequently than complaints.
- Use first names and everyday language. Tone is very important; don’t take on a litigious or hostile tone.
- Share parental memories, pride, and gracious appreciation for the other’s efforts.
A parent should not have to dread hearing from the child’s other parent. When it is necessary to voice a complaint, the parent should make it clear that his or her purpose is to solve the problem in the future, not to allocate blame. The complaining parent should explain the difficulties that arose from the other parent’s decision or conduct, suggest possible solutions, and invite the other parent’s suggestions and perspective.
For information about preparing co-parenting plans, contact the Law Offices of Renee Lazar at 978-844-4095 to schedule a FREE one hour no obligation consultation.