Scientists have demonstrated for decades that Massachusetts parents words exert tremendous power over a child's developing mind. What a parent says to their kid has very real consequences and there are words that seem to have overwhelmingly negative consequences. None of this has to do with culture or background or "grit"; this has to do with the practical ramifications of the actions taken by adults. So, yes, there are words that should be removed from the vocabulary of adults, not in the interest of furthering a cultural or political agenda, but in the interest of helping kids become happy adults.
A unifying theme of motherhood is guilt. Massachusetts mothers all feel it, react to it, and sometimes perpetuate it. No matter what choices are made about childcare, staying at home, working part-time, or pursuing a full-time career, mothers aren't immune to the nagging feeling that we could do better by our Massachusetts kids. Of course, mom guilt can be a good thing if it serves as a gentle reminder that our actions toward our children matter. Guilt, can be described as a healthy conscience and can be useful if it inspires more productive involvement or a sincere apology, or if it helps us bite our tongue.
There are a lot of tropes about Massachusetts fathers, but one tends to stick out the most: the distant. He's there, he's present - sort of - but he seems distant and far away. He's the dad on Stranger Things who reads the paper at breakfast and doesn't really seem to engage with his family; he's the dad who comes home from work and immediately retreats to the den. It's a cliche, but it's a cliche for a reason. Men tend to withdraw.
It's hard being a calm Massachusetts parent. The lack of sleep, the uncertainty of inexperience, the social pressures from other people - all of it undermines the effort to stay chill. Parents aren't supposed to lose their temper, but they inevitably do. And that's upsetting to children. If it happens a lot early in life, research indicates that the stress of exposure to anger can create behavior patterns that affect future socialization, emotional management, and self-esteem. Exposure to volatility can even lead to anxiety issues and OCD. Though the ideal solution may be to remain calm, the more workable solution is to know how to calm a kid down.
Massachusetts children need involved fathers throughout their lives. Kids with active dads are less likely to drop out of school, become obese, have risky sex, and develop mental health problems. But little boys, in particular, need their dads during the "terrible twos", when boys experience testosterone fueled aggression for the first time and have no idea how to deal with it. During this crucial period, it's up to father figures to show boys how to cope with their emotional impulses, so they don't become aggressive, violent men.
For Massachusetts parents of school-aged children, it can be difficult to ascertain if academic success a matter of nature or nurture. Do smart, rich parents raise smart, rich kids through genetics and socioeconomics-or by sitting next to them and helping with math homework? What role do father figures play in a child's odds of succeeding at school? A new study in the Journal of Labor Economics suggests that the main factor, stronger than DNA, is involved, active parenting.
Here's the data behind these conclusions....
You have your mother's eyes, your father's temperament, your grandfather's way with language, and your grandmother's personality - or maybe not. It's possible those claims, echoing through the course of your childhood, became a self-fulfilling prophecy. It's all part of the nature vs nurture debate, a story that is often oversimplified in child development by making broad generational comparisons. And those comparisons can be misleading, if not downright damaging, precisely because they conflate fate and genetics.
In order to find how parents viewed two distinct styles of parenting, researchers brought in a diverse range of parents from a wide variety of backgrounds. These parents were exposed to various scenarios depicting one of two types of parenting.
It's worth being an involved Massachusetts dad. Children with active fathers avoid risky sex, hold down high-paying jobs, have superior IQs, and are less likely to break the law or drop out of school. There's ample research out there on The Massachusetts Father Effect. Here's a breakdown of how it works.